Life has it’s ups and downs and I truly believe that a life of a believer, of someone who has faith, is not easy. It’s filled with tests, and trials, and obstacles. The struggle is part of maintaining faith. Sometimes, God puts us through something to make us stronger, to make us invincible in front of the problems that lie soon ahead of us. Or sometimes, He’s just seeing if we’ll come running back to Him — He pulls us closer through these hardships and problems so we turn right back around and run to Him, because maybe… just maybe, we had momentarily forgot about him. When I think of myself, I see all my flaws, all my sins — of course, in an introspective manner. I know where I need to improve spiritually, morally, in my character, in my prayers, everything. There’s so much room for improvement. But recently, I’ve pushed everyone away. Things are getting harder and harder, and I feel alone. I just lost someone who was my best friend. I don’t know if or when that person will ever come back, or if they’ll remember me and miss me, but I miss them dearly, and I pray that Allah brings them back to me. But then I feel that Allah may have taken that person away from my life temporarily, for right now — because, quite frankly, I may not need them at this moment… maybe they’re detrimental to my spiritual growth right now. Maybe Allah wants to refine that person and present them to me in the most perfected manner, so I can finally be content with that aspect of my life. And maybe I’m supposed to perfect myself for that person as well (of course, that’s not to say that we don’t perfect ourselves for God first and foremost). Regardless, as positive as this post may seem, there are things that I am struggling with and things that I am trying to accept but sometimes they’re just hard to chew and swallow like that. Either way, things are just getting harder, and I’m hoping God will soon show me the light that’s at the end of every tunnel of His.